I have coached and trained almost my entire career. Helping others achieve growth means leading people out of their comfort zones so that they may enjoy a desired new ability. Here is a key fundamental: We learn from our mistakes and we grow from our successes. I share this example:
A couple weeks ago on Christmas day a neighbor boy came to our door and asked if he could use our driveway to practice learning to ride his new bike. His driveway led into the street, and ours ended in our yard…much safer!
He mounted his new bike with his sparkling spokes and was ready to take the plunge. Since I spend so much time coaching people, I couldn’t resist offering a couple tips: First, I had him start with the right pedal up so that he could get a good start. Second, I encouraged him to pedal hard while looking straight ahead. Don’t look down! He took off and was tempted to look down. I stopped him and yelled, “Keep looking straight ahead!” He did. He had a success and made it all way to the end of the driveway. We repeated it three times, and we had three good outcomes. There were no falls. He was excited, and ran in to tell his Mom and Dad.
My goal in coaching him was not to have him learn by mistakes, rather to grow from his successes. Let’s face it, falling off a bike isn’t too motivating for most people. The lesson learned here is while we may learn from our mistakes, we grow from our wins. Think about it: If the only way we learned was from making mistakes, then the person in Illinois who had the most traffic accidents would be considered the best driver. Would you want to drive with him/her?
