How to increase your influence without saying a word

Posted: July 21, 2020 | Categories: Self-Improvement

“Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans”

– John Lennon

You don’t have to answer this question out loud.  I don’t want to embarrass you.  Have you ever sat through a performance, program, or sermon and found yourself dozing? Because you were amongst a crowd, nobody saw you…right?  No.  That’s not right.

Here is something that all presenters know:  If we are one person in a crowd of 250, we can make a positive difference on the presenter and the quality of the program just by our alertness, engagement, and expression on our face.  Part of my work involves public speaking, and one of the first things a presenter does is look for the “sparkler” in the crowd.  This person may have a built-in smile on their face, or just a sparkle in their eye, and we can pick it up like radar.  We don’t stare at this person, but we do glimpse at them a lot to help keep our energy level where it needs to be. Afterward, this person often has questions, and we realize that during the presentation we have built some trust with them, and we are probably very receptive to what they have to say.  They are more influential.

A few years ago I was in an audience listening to a presentation from a person who worked with autistic children.  I knew she had not given many presentations before, and I sensed she was a little nervous.  I was sitting towards the back of the room.  It was a 40-minute presentation, and the entire time I was looking at her and doing my best to be encouraging.  After the program she singled me out, and told me how much she appreciated my smile and encouraging nods.  She said she would never forget it.

The next time we are hearing someone present, let’s remind ourselves of the responsibility we have as a member of the crowd.  So often we make a difference without saying a word!

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