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Category: Team Building
Effective leaders are good repeaters
“Men must be taught as if you taught them not, and things unknown proposed as things forgot”
-Alexander Pope
Have you ever heard someone say, “I told them once and I shouldn’t have to tell them twice!”? In his book, “The motive”, Patrick Lencioni makes the point that CEOs often need to be “CRO’s. That means Chief Repeating Officer.
When I was in my early 20’s, I was going through sales training. I was fortunate to have a mentor coach who truly cared about me and wanted me to succeed. Like any good trainer, Mark believed in sticking to the fundamentals.
For my first couple months, Mark joined me on my sales calls. There were several instances where I overlooked a fundamental he had already taught me, and that weakened my sales presentation. After each call we would do a brief review. When Mark needed to correct me, he did so as if it were the first time he was telling me. He didn’t start out with, “Look Steve, like I told you before… Instead he simply repeated the fundamental as if it was the first time I had been told. I will never forget his caring and gentle persistence. Hardly a day goes by that I don’t remember Mark and something he taught me…with relentless tenacity. If we want to be strong coaches we need to stay in there with people and utilize the power of repetition.
A professional approach that builds trust
Here’s a question for you: What is the difference between “nagging” and “gentle persistence”? I am not sure I have the exact answer. I do know that when someone nags me, I can get irritated, yet if they persist in a gentle and gracious way, I am much more motivated.
A couple years ago I sent an email to a person in a marketing company. He was doing a project for me, and I had something I wanted to add. When I wrote Jason, I forgot to copy the president – something which I had agreed to always do. A short time later, I received this email from the president:
“Hi Steve: Just a friendly reminder to “cc” me when requesting projects from the staff. I really don’t mind, but if I know they are working on a project for you, I won’t interrupt them with other projects if i can avoid it. Thanks, J
I was impressed. Not only was the approach friendly and respectful, she took the time to state the WIFM. (What’s in in for me) I was not upset by this email. Quite the contrary, I was upset with myself for the error of omission. I promised myself I would stick to my commitment and always “cc” the president. I have kept that commitment.
This was a good approach that received my full cooperation. What if the email had a nasty tone like “As mentioned previously, I expect a “cc” when…” The president chose the high road. She was probably irritated that I forgot, then quickly shifted to solving the problem. That’s professionalism!
Great companies stay creatively alive!
I’ll start with two words: Apple and Disney. These names don’t just stand for some products or services. When we hear these names it can trigger the “kid” in us. For decades these companies have never seemed to lose their enthusiasm and continuous profitability. Instead of becoming too set in their ways, they believe in the old maxim, “Yesterday’s methods produce yesterday’s results”. Apple and Disney are driven by innovation and constant reinvention. What does it take to have these qualities? Perhaps we need to go back to our childhood to find out.
Many years ago, NASA did a study of 1600 individuals from infancy to adulthood. The goal was to measure the percentage of creativity in all the actions they observed:
Ages 1-5: 98%
Ages 6-10: 35%
Ages 11-15: 12%
Ages 16-20 5%
We know these observations are true. Just watch an infant during their waking hours. A couple of weeks ago I was babysitting for my 8-month old grandson. He was in the playpen and for all his time he was playing with toys, practicing his crawling, or keenly noticing his surroundings. Before we know it, he will be attending school, and will begin the process of learning the rules of life. He will also begin to sacrifice some of his creativity for compliance.
What can we do as teachers, coaches, bosses, and parents to make sure we tap into the creativity of our team member? First, we need to build a working environment that encourages idea fluency. To do this, we start with brainstorming. This step focuses on the quantity of ideas – not the quality. We get all our thoughts on the table. To successfully perform this step, we need to outlaw any “judgment” or “red-light” language. Here are some examples:
- “We tried that once”
- “We’re different”
- You can’t…”
- “It won’t…”
- “We have never…”
- “We don’t do things that way”
- “It’s not practical”
- “It’s against tradition”
- “That is not our responsibility”
- “It’s too…”
- “We don’t have time”
- “We’re not ready for that”
- “Let’s give it more thought”
- “They would never go for it”
- “Not THAT again!”
- “Where did you dig that one up?”
- “We’re doing alright”
- “That’s not us”
These “red-light” phrases should be avoided when you are in the brainstorming stage to get all the ideas written down. No judgment is allowed! (That comes in a later step when we are working towards solutions) Remember to activate creativity by starting with all the ideas…without judgment. It is fun, and you’ll feel like a kid again.
When it is Ok to be “edgy”
When I decided to become a professional coach, I began a long training process that included numerous practicums I was either directly involved in or part of the audience. These practicums were in the form of role-playing, and I remember one time the person in the coaching role became a little “edgy” when working with his sample client. I thought the coach was going to be criticized for his edginess. Instead, he was praised. What? Here’s why: Good teachers, coaches, and parents know how to pull out the best in people. When your pupil is not giving his or her best, you are probably going to be frustrated or disappointed, and it shows up in your voice. I am not referring to a “nasty” tone. I mean “edgy”. There is a big difference. Here is an example:
A couple weeks ago I was in my garage, and noticed the lawn tractor lights had been left on. As a result, the battery was dead. My wife had been the last one to use the tractor, and I brought the situation to her attention. In he response, I could tell she was irritated. Later that day, I mentioned she had sounded edgy, and asked why. She said she did not like the way I approached her. I asked her what would have been a better approach. She told me. Problem solved.
When those we interact with appear tense, we can gently and tactfully ask them what is bothering them. Sometimes it is us, but other times it is not. They may have had a big argument with their kids or spouse that morning. We don’t know. We ask. If we are the source, we can make the adjustment. If we don’t, resentment can set it in, and teamwork and communication suffer.
Here is the message: If we are not happy with something, don’t be afraid to let it show a little in our voice. If we sense someone else is a little tense, find out why. We will strengthen teamwork and communication.
The pride of ownership
Part of my coaching involves helping companies build collaborative teams. This process requires working with highly responsible people who know how to confront problems directly with no excuses or blame. We respect these qualities.
On the other hand, have you ever worked with someone who rarely admitted a mistake? Such folks aren’t gaining respect…they are sacrificing it. Here is an example I’ll never forget:
One afternoon about 30 years ago I was playing baseball with my then 5-year old son in our back yard. Kevin was practicing hitting, and I made a comment that seems to stun him. His face looked puzzled, and he said, “Dad, was that a put down?” I started to respond by rationalizing and being defensive. Then I stopped mid-sentence and said, “You’re right, Kevin. That was a put-down, and I was wrong to say that. I am sorry.” Kevin’s reaction was very calm. He said, “OK”. This was a teachable moment for me. I learned that people who like and trust us don’t expect us to be perfect. When we make a mistake and don’t own up to it, we can confuse people. When we admit our mistakes and apologize,, we strengthen trust and respect, and most important, the relationships. It has been estimated that nearly 50% of all business failures can be attributed to mistakes that are made but not admitted. Here’s the message: When we make a mistake, own up to it. We will gain respect and help open the door to stronger team collaboration.
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