Posted: May 7, 2024 | Categories: Leadership, Self-Improvement, Team Building

“Seek first to understand” – Stephen Covey

The above quote is from the late self-help author and trainer Stephen Covey.  This vital piece of the Golden Rule can serve us royally:

Two days ago I experienced a touching example of this powerful principle.  My wife and I were visiting our son and grandson.  Little 3-year old Levi was not having a good day.  He was cranky, defiant, and exhibiting unpleasant behavior.   Normally, he is cheerful and happy.  That night my son went through his normal routine of reading Levi a story and putting him to bed.  At around 3am, my son was awakened by Levi.  He was standing right next to David.  For the first time, Levi had crawled out of his crib.  A whole new era began!

The next morning Levi and his Dad worked together to convert his crib into a bed.  Then Levi asked his Dad, “Does this mean I can’t be your son anymore?”  WOW!  That is a show stopper.  Now we could see why his behavior was so conflicted.  He knew he needed to give up his crib, but he didn’t want to give up his Dad with it.  A warm, quality conversation followed, and Levi, his attitude, and behavior were back on track.

As I reflected on this story, I realized that, even though we are not 3 years old, we can relate to Levi.  When we know we need to move forward and undergo change, it can create an inner conflict.  If the source of this conflict is not discovered, hurt and misunderstanding can occur.  Seek first to understand.  When we do, barriers are removed, trust is strengthened, and we move forward!

Posted: February 15, 2024 | Categories: Customer service, Sales, Self-Improvement

This message is only taught to sales professionals, but it applies to all of us.  If we want to be in step with someone, always check our assumptions to see if they are correct.

Here is a painful example:  Many years ago I was facilitating a sales training session and we were covering the part of the sales process that included “check questions”.  Check questions are asked when we need to check the correctness of our assumptions.  One of our class participants was a car salesman and shared a conversation he had with a potential buyer.  The prospect was considering buying a new Corvette as a college graduation present for his daughter.  The customer asked, “Is this car fast?”.  Immediately the salesperson enthusiastically replied, “Absolutely!  This car will go up to 180mph!” As soon as he said that, the expression on the customer’s face went from happy to scared.  He did not want to give his daughter a car that went that fast.  The deal was off.  It cost the salesperson a $1700 commission.  He learned his lesson.  He said the next time he will ask a question first before he answered like, “Is speed important to you?”  This question would have allowed him to stay in step.

This story carries a lesson for all of us to remember:  Before we assume, check our assumption with a good “check question”. By doing this we will save ourselves unecessary stress, and maybe even a friendship!

Posted: December 11, 2023 | Categories: Customer service, Leadership, Self-Improvement

“To Thomas Jefferson, the argument interrupted the song.  To John Adams, is was the song”

Several years ago I worked with a company that produced special parts for the U.S. military aviation industry.  The workers in this shop were good at their job, and were also critical thinkers.  One day I was talking with Vernon, the owner, about his team.  He talked about Larry, an employee he liked very much.  He liked Larry because he was a nice guy who always got along and did his best to keep peace and harmony.  Larry was a “people-pleaser” and a peace keeper,  Vernon said, “I wish everyone was like Larry”, and I replied, “No, you don’t”.  You see, people who are peace keepers often avoid confrontation.  Sometimes, confrontation is just what we need to do to preserve peace and prevent resentment.

Here is an example:  A couple weeks ago my wife and I went to a local steakhouse.  We both ordered the same thing, and we were served quickly.  Even though the steaks didn’t look like the picture on the menu, we shrugged our shoulders and dug in anyway.  As we were eating the steak, I asked my wife if she thought they could have given us something different than we ordered.  Joyce asked the server, and we found out we had been served a larger and more expensive steak than we ordered.  Each steak was twice the price of what we expected.  We brought it to the attention of the server.  She said she could give us 10% off, and that was all she was authorized to do.  She said if that wasn’t acceptable, we could talk to the manager.  Being the peace keeper, I didn’t want to elevate the situation, but Joyce did.  Politely and tactfully, Joyce said she would like to talk to the manager.  They had a good dialogue, and the manager gave us an adjustment that was more than fair.   We were happy.  Mistakes happen.  We liked our server and we like the restaurant.  We will be back.  If we had not confronted the manager, we would have probably not returned.  This is an example of when confrontation is good.  Joyce created a “win-win”.

Posted: November 17, 2023 | Categories: Sales, Self-Improvement

“Success comes in cans”

-Fortune Cookie

Many people know the story of Sir Roger Bannister.  The legendary runner from the UK achieved something that physiologists said could never happen:  In 1954, he broke the 4-minute mile.  He believed he could do it, and he did.  Since that event, the 4-minute mile has been broken hundreds of times.  Bannister led the way.

This is a great story we all love to hear.  It reminds us that many of the barriers to success are in our thinking.  Bannister thought big!

My question is, “Where can we think bigger?”  About 20 years ago I was working for a company that did an excellent job of tracking sales goals.  Among the chatter throughout the sales team, the most common topic was the record revenue goal for one month:  $320K.  Many of us would come fairly close, but we always fell short.  Like breaking the 4-minute mile, the $320K record was a barrier in our minds.

Then one day a new kid came to town.  Hi name was Dan and for some reason he wasn’t aware of the 320K mark.  He fervently dug in to his work and within three months he broke the 320K barrier by nearly 40K.  It wasn’t a fluke.  For the next several months he kept breaking the threshold.  In less than a year he left to start his own company.  We all loved Dan and were sorry to see him go.  We missed him but we knew he left us with a gift of wisdom we could never forget:  We challenged ourselves to think bigger and put our goals in a “can”!

Posted: October 24, 2023 | Categories: Leadership, Management, Self-Improvement

“Compared to what we ought to be, we are only half awake”

-William James

Most of us live far within our limits.  We always remember those teachers, parents, coaches, and other special people who took the time to see our potential and push us to our limits.

In 5th grade, I was an under-performing student.  One day at the beginning of the school year our teacher, Mrs. “M”, announced a big project that was upcoming:  A class yearbook!  As she described the details of the endeavor, I thought to myself, “That’s going to be a lot of work for someone.”  I was right, and I soon found out it was me!  Mrs. “M” announced that I was the editor.  I didn’t want the job, and politely and respectfully told her “no thanks”.  She wouldn’t take “no” for an answer.  She said she had seen my writing and communication skills and I was the one for the job.  “You really mean that?”, I asked.  “Yes, I do!”, she replied.

I got to work on the project and gave it my best.  It turned out great, and during the process I was able to develop my natural talents to a much higher level.  The impact of Mrs. “M’s” challenge is still working for me today at age 74.

One of our jobs as a leader is to help build others and make them more successful.  To do this, we need to push our team members out of their comfort zone in the direction they were meant to go.  Mrs. “M” helped me to wake up, see my gifts, and dig in.