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Category: Self-Improvement

Go the extra mile with a “Jaw Dropper”

Posted: May 1, 2020 | Categories: Sales, Self-Improvement

About 15 years ago I was working for a company with a close-knit staff of about 25.  On one bittersweet day, we had a surprise going away party for a departing co-worker who had been part of the team for many years.  Tom was loved by his teammates, and we wanted to show our appreciation in a special way.

Tom was an active baseball player and loved the game.  We decided to buy him a mitt that was signed by each of us.  Because the mitt was a memento and likely would never be used, you would think we would have bought an inexpensive one.  No.  We bought a Wilson A-2000.  This is one of the most common choices of Major League pitchers, and they are predictably expensive.  Tom was overwhelmed and became very emotional.  Later he shared that his joy went way beyond the signed mitt.  It meant a lot that we thought that much of him.  What we did is called a “jaw-dropper”, and when we do things like this, they strengthen relationships and are never forgotten.

Due to the Corona Virus crisis, many of us are finding that we have extra time on our hands.  Here’s one way we can use this time wisely.  Deepen our relationships with a “jaw-dropper”.  Here are a couple other examples to get your creativity going:

My birthday was last Tuesday, and two of the cards I received were hand made.  Much time and thought had been put in to both cards.  In one case, the person had included pictures they had uncovered from my high school and college yearbooks.   Most important, each card had a touching personal note saying how much they valued me as a life-long friend.  At 71, getting something like that is truly a “jaw-dropper”

Think of a relationship you have that you value highly.  Why are they so important?  What is something that you could say or do for them that radiates your thoughts with an exclamation point?  Go for the “jaw-dropper’!


Finding your “true north”

Posted: April 23, 2020 | Categories: Self-Improvement

Discover your passion.  Find a need and fill it.  Love what you do.  Most of us have likely heard these “rah-rah” phrases.  Here is the reality:  When top business schools have conducted surveys the results consistently indicate that about 50-60% of the U.S. working population does not like his or her job. Their job is necessary to pay the mortgage and support the family.  Once we get situated, it is hard and often expensive to change.

We have probably all seen a situation when someone was well established in their career, earning a high income, and no longer liked their work.  They want to do something they enjoy, but can’t afford to make the change.

Our country is in midst of a health crisis now, and many we know are laid off or furloughed. The good news is that these folks have a lot of time  to re-evaluate and review their life plans.  As we do this, I want to give you some points to dwell on that can help you find your “true north”.  These questions come from Brian Tracy.  He is a successful author, business consultant, and trainer.  Here are his key points:

  1. You will always be the best at something that you love to do. If you could afford it, you would do it without pay.  It brings out the very best in you, and you get a tremendous amount of satisfaction and enjoyment when you are engaged in that particular work.
  1. You do it well. You seem to have a natural ability to perform in that area.
  1. This talent has been responsible for most of your success and happiness in life up to now. From an early age, it is something you enjoyed to do and you got the greatest rewards and compliments from other people.
  1. It is something that was easy for you to learn, and easy to do. In fact, it was so easy to do, you forgot when and how you learned it.  You just found yourself doing it easy and well one day.
  1. It holds your attention. It absorbs you and fascinates you.  You like to read about it, talk about it, and learn about it. It seems to attract you like a moth to a flame.
  1. You love to learn about it, and become better at it all your life. You have a deep inner desire to really excel in this particular area.
  1. When you do what you are ideally suited to do, time stands still.  You can often work in your area of special talent for long periods without eating or sleeping hour after hour because you get so involved in it.
  1. You really admire and respect other people who are good at what you are most suited to do. You want to be like them and be around them, and emulate them in every way.

Take some time to go narrow and deep on these points.  Odds are, you will find yourself closer to what you love, and more eager to pursue a new direction.


The most underused fundamental of leadership…

Posted: April 1, 2020 | Categories: Customer service, Leadership, Self-Improvement

Dale Carnegie spent over 40 years working with teams and individuals in their efforts to become stronger leaders.  As he reflected back on his career, it was his belief that giving honest and sincere appreciation was the most overlooked principle of leadership.  When we fall short in this area, relationships can suffer.  Here is an example.

I know someone who loves to do little things for others.  If she goes on a trip, she buys something for each of her co-workers.  She remembers birthdays, and takes pride in giving special cards and a little gift.  She is also involved in a group, and just two weeks ago made cupcakes for a member who was celebrating their birthday.   She was excited going in, but not coming out.  She did not receive one thank you for the cupcakes of her efforts to make them.  Had this been the only time this had happened, she could have probably shrugged it off.  She reflected on all the things she the little things she had done this year, and could not recall one person saying thank you.  She also realized that not saying thank you is a new trend.  Just think of your own experience:  For me, when I buy something at the store, about half the time the clerk says thank you.  Where I come from, forgetting to say thank you is rude.

Now that many of us have some extra time brought about by this Corona virus, how about making a goal to strengthen our relationships?  Did you enjoy the musical performance?  Take the time to say thanks.  Did someone take the time to smile at you today and brighten you day?  Let them know it.  Did someone make something for you or send you a card or nice email?  Take the time to thank them sincerely.  Your star will shine.  Let’s end with the immortal words of Dale Carnegie referring to those who take time to appreciate:

The rare individual who honestly satisfies this heart hunger will hold people in the palm of his or her hand and even the undertaker will be sorry then he dies”


Make the most of “down” time

Posted: March 26, 2020 | Categories: Self-Improvement, Time management

We are in the midst of a world Pandemic, and to slow the spread of the virus, many businesses in the country have been closed temporarily.  That means many of us are experiencing a long, unexpected chunk of discretionary time.  How can we best use this time?

Let’s fast forward to 6 months from now.  Business is back in full force, and we have resumed our busy schedule.  What would we wish we had done with this idle time if we had it to do over?  Asking this question can generate many answers.  Here are some that might pop up on the list:

Relationships:  Most families in America could spend more time in quality conversation.  In a survey done by Nick Stinnet and John DeFrain, they found that married couples spent an average of 5 minutes each day with each other, and less than 30 seconds with their children.  What?  Yes.  They weren’t talking about transactional dialogue, like “Did you take the trash out” or “Be sure and pick up milk and bread”.  The goal is quality conversation, and it can make a big difference,  During this “off” season, it can be good time to set up a routine where you have time for more important interaction.

Health:  There are three areas that 90% of our goals fall in to:  Health, relationships, and financial security.  They are the three legs to the stool of a stable, happy life.  Are you intentional about planning nutritious meals?  Do you have a well-balanced daily exercise routine that includes cardio, flexibility, and strength exercise?  Do you have a special time each day to do it?

Financial security:  OK,  I am an executive coach, not a financial planner.  What I do know is that success in your career can lead to more financial security assuming you are wise with money.  Where do you want to be in your career 5 years from now?  What do you need to learn to get there?  What courses and certifications will be required?  Have you been putting off getting started in these areas?  If so, now might be the time.

Remember:

  1.  Select the area.
  2. Make a detailed plan.
  3. Set up a routine and block time.
  4. Hold your feet to the fire and be committed

Let’s turn this lemon into a lemonade!


What is means to be “busy”

Posted: March 9, 2020 | Categories: Self-Improvement

“Good manners are made of petty sacrifices”

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

In September of 1992, my oldest son entered 1st grade.  After a week went by, Kevin shared something special that his teacher did.  She boosted his confidence, and made him feel better about himself.  When Kevin shared this story, I began reflecting on my 1st grade teacher.  I had just moved from another state, and I didn’t know anyone.  Mrs. Wingard made me feel special, and she did it by her genuine smile and interest in me as a person.   I never forgot it.  I decided it was time to say thank you.  I took 15 minutes to write a hand-written note expressing my gratitude, and telling her how important she was in my life.  Three days letter my mother called.  Mrs. Wingard called her, and was ecstatic about the note.  She had retired, and said that in all her years, she had never received a note like that.  I had done something that was very meaningful to someone else, and it only took me 15 minutes?  It was an eye-opener.

Are you a busy person?  Are you too busy?  Here are some words I read many years ago that may help answer this question:

You know you are too busy if you don’t…

  • Write thank you notes
  • Call family members just to say “Hi”
  • Give a hug to someone
  • Cry with someone who has experienced a recent loss
  • Write a letter to a friend
  • Acknowledge birthdays in some way
  • Read a good book
  • Listen to some good music
  • Visit a friend
  • Play with your grandchildren
  • Say “I love you” to your parents
  • Say “I love you” to your children
  • Learn something new
  • Smile
  • Compliment someone
  • Share a sunrise/sunset with someone
  • Listen to the birds/smell the roses
  • Climb a mountain

Time to get really busy!

 


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