Posted: September 15, 2022 | Categories: Customer service, Leadership, Self-Improvement, Team Building

In my post on September 13th, I talked about how we can prevent gossip by speaking up and confronting situations directly.  But wait a minute…What if we try to speak up and it ends up in a vicious argument?  We don’t want that.

To create and facilitate a quality conversation that solves problems, builds trust and prevents resentment, here are some points to keep in mind:

1. What is your trust level with this person?  If we don’t like or respect them, we can bet our attitude about them will leak.  (Attitudes almost always do)
2. Begin in a friendly way.  Assuming we do have adequate trust established, we should begin in a friendly manner.  In other words, don’t start out saying, “I have a bone to pick with you!”
3. Relate the fact.  Without judgment, relate the fact of what the other person did or didn’t do.  Then gently describe the effects this action had on you and your ability to do your job.
4. Ask them for a solution.  Instead of dictating, give the other person a chance to take ownership.  Ask them for ideas.  Listen, ask questions, and respond.
5. Come to a consensus.  Decide on solution and make sure you both agree.
6. Reassure.  Give reassurance that you are good with the solution and the problem is solved.  Agree to put the situation behind you, and move forward!

No matter how hard we try, we are going to do things that create a burden for someone else.  When we do, imagine how much smoother things will go if we approach in the way outlined above.

Posted: September 13, 2022 | Categories: Customer service, Leadership, Team Building

Yes,  you read it right!  I said “eliminate”.

A few years ago I was working with a manufacturing team that wanted to be more productive.  The first step was to have each participant do a self-assessment to help identify their personality and communication style.  One of the team members was classified in the “Mediator” category.  People in this group tend to be strong on harmony.  “Let’s get along” is their motto.  Richard, the business owner commented that he wished he had a whole team of “mediators”.  “No, you don’t”, I replied.  Why?

A Mediator wants to see everyone work together and get along.  What’s the “flipside”?  Mediators are usually very uncomfortable with conflict.  There are times when we feel betrayed or simply disagree.  If we don’t speak up, we can become frustrated and internalize our feelings.  Unfortunately, doing this usually leads to us talking to someone else about our concern rather the person we should be talking to.  This often leads to gossip, and gossip is not good for teamwork.

We all know the signs:  When lunch break comes, certain clusters go off to another room.  You know when your name is discussed because everyone gets quiet when you approach.

What do we do?  Break the pattern.  If someone has done or said something that has made it more difficult for you to do your job, speak up!  Approach the person in a friendly way.  Focus on the problem not the personality.  Refrain from being judgmental.  Relate the incident and how it affects your work.  Seek common ground.  In doing so, you will take an action step in creating a more positive working environment.

Posted: May 25, 2022 | Categories: Customer service, Self-Improvement

Have you ever seen skywriting?  Skywriters fly planes carrying banners with special messages on them.  The message could be an ad or it might be a marriage proposal above a football stadium.  Whatever the situation, you can bet that a high price is paid for each word.  There may be a lesson here for all of us.  The fewer words we use to communicate a thought or idea, the easier the message is to absorb.  Here are some examples:

“at this point in time”                                                   change to                                “at this time”

“keep in mind that…”                                                   change to                                “remember that”

“held a meeting to discuss”                                         change to                                “met to discuss”

“in the event that”                                                         change to                                            “if”

“Until such time you are in a position to…”            change to                                “when you are able to”

“Your check in the amout of $360”                          change to                                 “your check for $360″

”

Keeping our communiation simple and direct allows us to be better understood and more likely to be influential

Posted: January 11, 2022 | Categories: Customer service, Leadership, Management, Team Building

Here’s a question for you: What is the difference between “nagging” and “gentle persistence”? I am not sure I have the exact answer.  I do know that when someone nags me, I can get irritated, yet if they persist in a gentle and gracious way, I am much more motivated.

A couple years ago I sent an email to a person in a marketing company. He was doing a project for me, and I had something I wanted to add. When I wrote Jason, I forgot to copy the president – something which I had agreed to always do. A short time later, I received this email from the president:

“Hi Steve: Just a friendly reminder to “cc” me when requesting projects from the staff. I really don’t mind, but if I know they are working on a project for you, I won’t interrupt them with other projects if i can avoid it. Thanks, J

I was impressed. Not only was the approach friendly and respectful, she took the time to state the WIFM. (What’s in in for me) I was not upset by this email. Quite the contrary, I was upset with myself for the error of omission. I promised myself I would stick to my commitment and always “cc” the president. I have kept that commitment.

This was a good approach that received my full cooperation. What if the email had a nasty tone like “As mentioned previously, I expect a “cc” when…” The president chose the high road. She was probably irritated that I forgot, then quickly shifted to solving the problem. That’s professionalism!

Posted: November 16, 2021 | Categories: Customer service, Leadership, Self-Improvement, Team Building

When I decided to become a professional coach, I began a long training process that included numerous practicums I was either directly involved in or part of the audience. These practicums were in the form of role-playing, and I remember one time the person in the coaching role became a little “edgy” when working with his sample client. I thought the coach was going to be criticized for his edginess. Instead, he was praised. What? Here’s why: Good teachers, coaches, and parents know how to pull out the best in people. When your pupil is not giving his or her best, you are probably going to be frustrated or disappointed, and it shows up in your voice. I am not referring to a “nasty” tone. I mean “edgy”. There is a big difference. Here is an example:

A couple weeks ago I was in my garage, and noticed the lawn tractor lights had been left on. As a result, the battery was dead. My wife had been the last one to use the tractor, and I brought the situation to her attention. In he response, I could tell she was irritated. Later that day, I mentioned she had sounded edgy, and asked why. She said she did not like the way I approached her. I asked her what would have been a better approach. She told me. Problem solved.

When those we interact with appear tense, we can gently and tactfully ask them what is bothering them. Sometimes it is us, but other times it is not. They may have had a big argument with their kids or spouse that morning. We don’t know. We ask. If we are the source, we can make the adjustment. If we don’t, resentment can set it in, and teamwork and communication suffer.

Here is the message: If we are not happy with something, don’t be afraid to let it show a little in our voice. If we sense someone else is a little tense, find out why. We will strengthen teamwork and communication.