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Are you thinking right? (about people)
Have you ever had a bad day at work? If you have, there is a good chance that your frustration was sparked by your boss or a co-worker. It could have been something they said, or didn’t say, or did or didn’t do. Whatever the irritation, you let it affect your day.
In my coaching and team building, I frequently come across team members who challenge each other’s patience. Would you like to know a secret? Attitudes leak!
Several years ago I was coaching someone who worked for a construction company. It was a large company, and she had worked there several years. Although she liked the company, there was one person who offended her almost daily. He was the controller, and just about every day she would need to talk to him about information she needed or something he was required to sign. Every time she talked to him, she walked away feeling humiliated and frustrated, and this had a negative impact on her day.
It was a 12-week course, and after 6 weeks, I realized she was still talking about the controller and how he made her life miserable. At this point, I knew it was time to say something: I asked her, “Mary, when you are entering Ed’s office, what are your thoughts?” She said her thoughts were “I have to go talk to this jerk again”. Next I asked her, “Did you ever hear the expression, “attitudes leak?”. We talked through it and she decided that the next time she walked in his office, she was going to simply think about the purpose of the conversation, and not think negatively about Ed. She began doing this as a habit. The whole situation turned around. They didn’t become good friends, but she was able to work with him and not let him negatively affect her day.
There are many turnaround stories like this I have experienced in my coaching. In his book, “The Magic of Thinking Big”, David J. Schwarz says we need to “Think right about people”. That’s good advice that can help us enjoy our work more.