Last evening I helped facilitate a team meeting for one of my clients. This gathering was also a celebration of a business expansion. The well-seasoned team was overflowing with energy and verve. As I was observing the team, I realized that every person in the room had gone through significant struggle and challenge in their professional development.
The most recent example is Cliff. He is a go-getter and moves at a fast pace. His challenge was to be a better listener. In his zeal he would “talk over” people and cut them short in conversations. This was creating a problem. Some customers would feel hurried, and they did not feel Cliff listened well to them.
Chris’ boss approached him. He used the “I” method developed by Dr. Thomas Gordon. Here are the steps he went through:
Relate the problem
Give a specific example
Explain the reactions others had to what he did, said, or did not do or did not say.
Express why this behavior bothers you, and how you feel about it. (You don’t like unhappy customers)
Ask for an action plan.
Chris responded as a fine team player. He agreed that this was a problem and he committed to eliminating this habit. It was very hard for Cliff to change this lifetime habit, but he had the desire and determination to change. He knew it was important. Within a few weeks he was doing much better, and his performance moved to beyond expectations.
As I mentioned, Cliff’s story was one of many in the team. The key point is that each member of this highly successful group makes a habit of determining where they need to get better, and then they take action.
