Increase credibity with more thoughfulness

Posted: May 25, 2021 | Categories: Leadership, Presentation skills, Sales

When I was young, I used to watch a TV show called, “To Tell the Truth”. Here’s how it worked:

The show would begin with three people standing side by side. They would each pretend to be the same famous person that you had probably not seen before. (Like Dr. Suess) Each one said the same thing: “My name is Ted Geisel” One of the three was that famous person. The other two were impostors. The show host would then read a sworn affidavit by the famous person describing themselves and all their achievements. Then a panel of celebrities would each have their turn to question the people standing. After their time for questioning expired, the panel members were asked to cast their vote for who they believe was the real Ted Geisel. Even though I wasn’t there to ask questions, I was in on the game, and made my guess when the panel members did. My guess was almost always right. I had a secret that worked:

Instead of trying to judge content accuracy, I focused on the tone of voice, body language, eye movement, and the way the person responded. I was particularly sensitive to those who responded quickly and with confidence. I found the authentic contestants were slower to respond, more thoughtful, and would sometimes ask clarifying questions. In other words, the real person was usually not “slick”.

There seems to be common misconception that when we respond quickly, we show more confidence. Sometimes just the opposite is true. We respect the more thoughtful response that indicates to us that the other person is listening and cares. Being more thoughtful in our responses can increase our trust and credibility.

You may ask, “Is there any time when we shouldn’t respond slowly? Yes. If you spouse asks you if you still love them, respond quickly…very quickly!

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